Effective Intercommunication

Relationship therapist John Gray's 1992 bestselling book Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus explains the difference in communication styles of men and women by humorously suggesting that they are from different planets, and that these differences contribute to communication conflicts. Gray posits that men and women often appear to be speaking entirely different languages, even when the vocabulary, syntax, and grammar they use are the same. Linguist Deborah Tannen, whose 1990 book You Just Don't Understand: Women and Men in Conversation, on the New York Times Best Seller list for nearly four years, brought gender differences in communication style to the general public. Tannen contends that differences between the communication styles of women and men are the result of more th

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n of girls and boys. These "gender differences, whether genetic or learned, become parts of the communication pattern that stays with us for life" (Male/Female Communication Styles). Julia Wood (2004) states that "research of women's and men's communication reveals that the rules taught through childhood play are evident in adult interaction" (p. 117). She makes the point, however, that "not all women follow rules of feminine communication communities and not all men follow rules of masculine ones" (p. 117). Both Wood (2004) and Tannen (1993) agree "socialization in different gender communities accounts for some common misunderstandings between women and men" (Wood, p. 118). Tannen (1993) contends that men and women speak differently in face-to-face conversation because children are socially molded and trained to speak separate languages based on their gender. They both offer examples regarding how males and females discuss problems. When a woman tells a man about something that is troubling her, he responds by offering advice or a solution. On the other hand, women view communication as a way to build connections and are looking for empathy and discussion of feelings prior to advice. According to Wood (2004), "the most commo
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Approximate Pages = 5 (250 words per page)