Choice Theory by William Glasser describes a method to bring people closer together in relationships. According to the author, the core of most major human problems is the misery caused by unsatisfying relationships. Further, the problems in such relationships are exacerbated by traditional therapeutic methods, labelled by Glasser as external control psychology. Glasser proposes a new psychology called choice theory which emphasizes personal freedom. This book is intended to teach the audience the harmfulness of external control psychology and how to replace it with choice theory. The person who uses choice theory continually asks himself or herself whether their actions will bring them closer to people in relationships or farther apart.
To understand choice theory it is first necessary to understand external control psychology and how the two differ. External control psychology encourages relationships in which people with power destroy the personal freedom of the powerless. Those in power, and this ranges from government officials to spouses to parents, operate on the theory that they know what is right and it is their moral obligation to coerce others to conform. External control psychology "is the psychology of our ancestors, our parents, and grandparents, of our teachers and leaders, of almost all the people we know or know about" (6). According to Glasser, external control psychology is the cause of most of the misery in the world.
When those in power are dissatisfied with someone, they try to "stimulate" that person to change. And they waste a great deal of time and energy trying to do this. When they discover how hard it is to change another person they begin to blame the other person for the failure. From blaming, it is a very short step to punishing. A whole range of coercive behaviors is developed, aimed at punishing the other person for being so obstinate: "In an external control world, the system is n...