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Three Essays on Dying and Loss

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In On Death and Dying, Elisabeth Kubler-Ross (1997) maintains from a study of former cultures and people, ôàwe are impressed that death has always been distasteful to man and will probably always beö (16). Despite our attempts to contemplate death or to deal with it in a rational manner, it is an impossible goal to completely rid ourselves of our fear of death. Death remains a fearful and frightening reality for human beings, one that Ross (1997) argues is a ôuniversal fear even if we think we have mastered it on many levelsö (19). Because of the psychological trauma associated with death, both oneÆs own and the death of loved ones, Kubler-RossÆ studies have resulted in the distillation of a five-stage process of dealing with death and dying.

Kubler-RossÆ (1997) 5 stages of accepting death and dying include: 1) denial and isolation, 2) anger, 3) bargaining, 4) depression, 5) acceptance. The individual who must accept his or her impending death moves through these stages of acceptance, all of which may overlap. During the first stage of the process, denial and isolation, the individual refuses to believe his or her death is inevitable. Shock, isolation and withdrawal, and other defense mechanisms are used to shield the psyche from the frightening and traumatic reality of death. In stage two, anger, the individual often experiences feelings of anger, rage, envy, and resentment. Thoughts like ôLife is unfairö and ôWhy did this happen to me?ö are common. As Kubler-

. . .
n contemplate. Kubler-RossÆ stages of dying demonstrate the complexity of dealing with the cognitive aspects of coming to terms with the loss known as death. From an affective perspective, our death makes us react, feel, and behave in ways that are quite distinct from our typical affect. From a social perspective, we may withdraw from our friends or family members. We may exhibit anger and become cross with those trying to care for us. In other cases, we might react with silence, shutting out everyone and everything. On the spiritual level, the loss of life raises many issues. We may doubt our faith because of anger. Many people become angry at God or shun their faith because of a death they believe is unfair or shows that God does not really care about individuals. Other people may become extremely drawn to their spirituality, finding some kind of inner peace and acceptance while alive based on their beliefs. For those who exhibit little spirituality in an organized sense, such as an existentialist or atheist, individuals might consider a life well-lived enough of a spiritual boost to endure the pain and privation of death and dying. When it comes to a systemic perspective, individuals in different cultures will more tha
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Approximate Word count = 2601
Approximate Pages = 10 (250 words per page)

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