Berne's Games People Play: A Modern Classic
Eric Berne published Games People Play: The Psychology of Human Relationships in 1964. The book was an immediate market success, largely because it spoke to something many people recognized -- that much of human social interaction and intercourse resembled nothing so much as a formalized, ritualized "game" or sequence of games in which jockeying for position and power was ongoing. Berne (17) describes "social programming" as a fundamental basis for this perception, noting that social programming results in traditional ritualistic or semi-ritualistic interchanges. A progression can be observed from social to individual programming in which sequences, called games, are established as normative frameworks for social intercourse. Berne's work, while not fully unique, was able to impress on the lay, public consciousness an awareness of how these "games" impacted upon intimate relationships.
Berne opens his discussion of games by stating that "to say that the bulk of social activity consists of playing games does not necessarily mean that it is mostly 'fun' or that the parties are not seriously engaged in the relationship." It is his thesis, explicated throughout the text, that games are deliberate constructions that inhibit meaningful intimacy -- which he saw as "the only completely satisfying answer to stimulus-hunger, recognition-hunger, and structure-hunger." In other words, Berne believed that while human beings desperately want and need to make intimate contact with one another and to reveal themselves to others in hope of acceptance and support, the inherent difficulty and even anxiety created by such a task often leads to the development of ritualized "programs" which present the appearance but not the substance of intimacy.
Berne (19) notes that social contact has several advantages that revolve around somatic and psychic equilibrium. Such advantages are related to the followin...