Is there a situation where a smile might not be the best response?
A smile can say many things. It is a universal language for hello, goodbye, I've missed you, I'm happy, you're welcome, and much more. A smile is encouraging, motivating, and strengthening. Carnegie brings out "Actions speak louder than words, and a smile says, "I like you, You
make me happy. I am glad to see you" (pg. 64). Nonetheless, there are situations where a smile may not be the best action and may, at times, elevate a conflict. A smile, if not genuine, can depict apathy, arrogance, and insincerity. Therefore, it is imperative to consider the how and when one smiles, to understand what is best needed for a situation.
In high-tension situations, a smile may ease the pressure of an irate employee, customer, or colleague, or it may ignite their anger. An employee or colleague approaching management with urgency or irritation may actually be set off by a smile. In these situations, the smile may imply that management is trivializing their emotions or frustrations or that they are ignoring what the upset party is really trying to convey. This is especially the case when the person approaching management with the problem is already hesitant or defensive. This is not to say that one's smile is not genuine kindness, but rather, that it may be perceived as insincere. This insincerity breeds resentment. "An insincere grin... ? We know it is mechanical and we resent it" (p. 65).
Considering the situation also requires cultural sensitivity. When dealing with people from different social or ethnic backgrounds, sometimes a smile is a sign of disrespect. It is always important to "know your audience" so that you may gauge how your behavior will be taken. Will a smile be encouraging or belittling? A sign of friendship? Or a sign of disrespect?
Similarly, when dealing with a memorial occasion or tribute to someone who has passed away, or a situation w...