During the past few decades, divorce has become much more common. At the present time, almost half of all marriages end in divorce. In most of those instances, children are involved. The effect of divorce on children is almost universally negative in the short-term, although there is disagreement about the long-term effects. The intent in this paper is to look at some of the impacts of divorce on the children in the family, using both written material and anecdotes from personal interviews.
There are a number of obvious short-term impacts on the children of divorce. Some of these are positive. For example, when divorce occurs in a household that has been characterized by violence and battering, the level of violence is likely to decrease if the courts have awarded custody to the non-offending parent. Divorce can reduce conflict in the home, since the warring parties are no longer living together.
However, there are also many more difficult effects. The family of a single parent is likely to suffer from many deprivations. There is less money for everything and less time, too. Children are likely to get less attention, because they are only dealing with one adult.
A friend of mine talked about this problem. Her parents got divorced when she was 12 years old and she began living with her father, who she still lives with. The court ordered her mother to stay away from the family, because the mother is a drug addict. However, Nancy said that her father never has any time to spend with her either. He provides enough money for her to survive, but gives her no attention. Nancy herself has become addicted to drugs. She no longer pays attention to her father's rules and he does not seem to notice anything she does anymore. She feels a lot of pain and grief about being ignored in her own home and she believes that that is why she uses drugs.
In general, children may feel a great deal of pain, grief, and heartache...